The Moment of Avoidance

Yesterday, I read this letter again, it has been sitting on my desk for 49 years.  It is my letter of acceptance to medical school, dated November 22, 1968.  I read it to one of my associates and said, "On the day I received this letter, my life changed forever."  

Today, t saw five minutes of Field of Dreams.  In that movie, Burt Lancaster plays the role of Moonlight Graham.   In a dream-like moment, his character is offered an opportunity to fulfill his childhood dream of batting in the baseball major leagues.  He says, "No.". He is told, "It would kill some men to be so close to their dream and not touch it.  They would consider it a tragedy. "

Lancaster's character, Dr. Graham, who had been a general practitioner for fifty years in a small town, responded, "Son, if I had only been a doctor for five minute that would have been a tragedy." 

As I read that. I realized again how deeply grateful I an to have been given the privilege of being a doctor.  

Being a doctor is not the technology, the science, the honor, the success, the prosperity; it is the people, who one by one, day by day, make me a doctor every day.  It is the people who have filled my life with joy, happiness and significance.  

Of course, the most important people are Carolyn, Carrie, Sam, Richmond, Jennifer, Beau, Hannah, Holly, Elizabeth, Emma, Kate, Richmond Everett, Wyatt and tens of thousands more.  

It is this that prevented my life from being a tragedy.

Every person must discover their "moment of avoidance," their moment of avoiding turning their life into a tragedy.

James L. Holly, M.D.
Former CEO, SETMA
mailto:Jholly@jameslhollymd.com
http://www.jameslhollymd.com
409 504-4517
Adjunct Professor
Department of Family and Community Medicine UT Health San Antonio Joe R. and Teresa Lozano Long School of Medicine 

Responses on Face Book

Linda Cooper Person -- Beautifully stated. God bless you and your family.

Paul Grundy August 25, 2017 at 4:06:39 PM CDT -- Larry You are such an amazing inspiration to so many of us thank you and thanks to the UTSA for accepting you.  

James Shepherd -- This statement is from a fellow physician who is one of the finest I know I often think the same, how crucial moments in our lives can change everything including the very course of our lives. I went straight from high school to six years of medical school in 1965. My high school principal was not very helpful and indicated, in his letter of recommendation that he thought my stutter would be an insurmountable problem to a medical career.  I had an interview with the vice dean of Glasgow school of medicine and fortunately I had a good speech day and was accepted. Who knows what would have happened if I had a bad day!

An Experience with a moment of avoidance

I wish to respond only to the statement, "I know that you have accomplished much more in your life than I ever will.” I understand why this was said but it is not absolutely true.

Each of us is a collage of influences, some good and some bad. There is no doubt in my mind that today I could not and would not be accepted to medical school. I was at the right place at the right time.  Depending upon your philosophy that is good fortune or providence; I choose providence.  

When I was in the eighth grade – I was twelve years old – a coach went around the class telling each of us, publicly, what he thought of us. Of me he said, and I remember his words precisely and I hear them in my mind in his voice, “Larry, you are a follower; you will never amount to much and will only do what others tell you to do.”   

Philmore Evans, African American who lived across the road from us, told my father in my presence, “I have never seen the boys do as much as their father.” 

This is not an epistle, but the summary is that with the grace and empowerment of God, I Have taken full advantage of the opportunities given to me.

You have earned and been given an opportunity. What you do with it will determine not only your future but that of others. If you are wise and learn from our discussion today, this can become your legacy. I expect that to be the case. It will require hard work and long hours.  

Your response is your decision. Your outcome will be yours to have, but never imagine that you cannot be as great as anyone, including and especially me.

You may decide that you don’t want to pay the price in effort and energy required to put your Imprimatur upon your future. Only you can decide that.

I believe you can and hope that you do. But never think that you can’t because you are not as good as someone else. If you become a great team; you will do just that.

Margaret Golias -- Were your hands shanking?

James L Holly -- No, it never occurred to me that I would not be accepted. That was not hubris; it was stupidity.  

Jay Raj -- Nice post - incidentally I was two days old when you got that admission letter to UT Larry!

James L. Holly -- Braggart!! Smile. The cadence of life is rich at any and at every age.   

The greatest change in that cadence is in the growth of the richness of our memories. I look forward to the next 20 years. First to know how much of them I will know and second to know if I navigate them as well as I now hope. 

Once you have experienced your birth and your marriage, the next milestone is one's death. Each defines the quality and significance of life. Each can be anticipated with courage and joy.

Jay Raj -- Really it was coincidence to see that date but when I met you few years back realized how smart you were and how well you organized your days to run it efficiently and learnt whole lot from your fb posts. Keep it coming

James L. Holly to Jay Raj -- You are very kind.

On Aug 26, 2017, at 6:24 PM, Maureen Bisognano said -- Wow, Larry what an amazing moment back in time!  We are so privileged, aren't we?

I had to laugh at the $30 deposit requested! I went to nursing school because, being the oldest of nine kids, my parents couldn't afford any tuition support. My tuition, room and board was $300 a year with uniforms and books extra. I took out a loan and worked in a public hospital for five years to pay it back!  What fun to look back on our journey and to see how we are making impact now!  Maureen, President Emerita and Senior Fellow Institute for Healthcare improvement

Dennis Toland  -- August 26, 2017 at 3:22:57 PM CDT

The Moment of Avoidance -- I have thought of this many times. You may not remember, but I was accepted to medical school TWO weeks after classes had started. One of the students dropped out suddenly and they wanted to fill that space.  I was taking ______ back to school, and a message was under her door that the medical school was looking for me. I found out that day they wanted me to be his replacement.  I drove back to Beaumont that night (600 miles) to get some clothes and drove back to Lubbock the next day, found an apartment, purchased books, enrolled in school, and started medical school 3 days later.

I got 4 hours sleep for 2 months, and, after the first semester, ended up in the top quarter. I was excited and gave all the glory to Him, but was also bitter, because there were students there that I was infinitely more qualified that were accepted before me. It was very humbling, and I have never forgot that.

The next year, they asked me to be on the admissions council, and I saw several problems with their process. They changed these.

There was a movie several years ago with Michael Cain, called Mr Destiny. It pointed out that there are certain times in everyone's life that choices or circumstances will change one's life in a dramatic way.

It was that moment that I reflected on my personal life and how grateful I am to Him. Doing what I would have done for free, and continuing to enjoy it. As you have heard before, if you are doing something you love, you will never work a day in your life!

Thanks for sharing, my dear friend,  Comment from a friend

 The Moment of Avoidance 

Larry--this brought tears to my eyes! what an inspiration you are to me as I make some hard, unplanned and unwanted transitions because of my husband's health. God has put you in my life just when I need your perspective---God bless

Margaret Golias -- You are truly a gifted physician as well as a gifted human being. Your an inspiration and comfort to all . Being a good doctor isn't just during office hours, it's a 24/7 365 days a year! I'm privileged to know you and Carolyn, I can only hope that some of your wisdom, kindness and loving qualities influence me in my daily walk with God!

I'm a goal-oriented person so I have my work cut out for me! As I sit here thinking about all the good things that I know how you have touched so many lives, I feel so inadequate to even try sometimes! But I'm German so giving up isn't in my DNA. I love a challenge, a goal but mostly just a flicker of making a difference in someone's or some animals life! I don't want money or praise just the inner satisfaction of knowing I helped make a difference! At the age of 60, I realize time isn't on my side so I better get with the program and encourage my two daughters to set goals that are important to them!