It seems impossible that a year has passed since we were required to say good-bye to our friend and colleague. Yet it has. Each of us who had the privilege of knowing and loving Mark have stories of our experiences since his death.

The first memory which comes to my mind occurred at his memorial service. At the service, the pall bearers selected their lapel boutonnieres and took their seat, but no one noticed. As the coffin was carried from the church, the pall bears took their places and someone noticed but didn't say anything. At the graveside, many of us began counting. Six friends had been designated as pall bearers but try as we would, we counted seven, not six. After the grave side service, one friend and pall bearer approached this seventh pall bearer and said, "None of us know who you are."

The answer brought a question to everyone's mind and then a smile to their faces. "I didn't know Dr. Wilson but saw the notice of his service in the newspaper. He seemed like a nice man and I just wanted to help so I came down and joined the pall bearers." The question which crossed everyone's mind who knew Mark well, wondered if he arranged this before he died. But, no, the man assured us this was his idea. Even so, everyone smiled and a few chuckled, "Only Mark Wilson." In our experienced, such a thing had never happened before and we all suspected, we will never see it again, but it did make the memorial service of a unique man, unique.

How often did many of us reach for the telephone only to remember, we could no longer call Mark. How endearing became our memories of those phrases we heard from Mark so often": "What else is going on?" which was always his way of continuing a conversation and not allowing too much quiet time to pass, or "Hey, ______, it's Mark," as if his voice needed identification.

We took actions because it was important to us to effectively remember our friend.

• A blog was established on SETMA's Intranet so that his colleagues could share "Mark Stories" and "Experiences with Mark."
• Your Life Your Health columns appeared on March 26, 2009 and April 2, 2009 about our friend.
• SETMA's Founders' Award was renamed the Mark A. Wilson Founder's Award.
• SETMA's West End Medical Clinic was renamed the Mark A. Wilson SETMA West Clinic
• Many of us still visit his grave periodically as a "touch point" for our remembering.

SETMA's website has radically changed in this past year, but some things have stayed the same:

• Under "About Us - History," Mark's name and picture remain. If you click on either, it takes you to his memorial with links to the Your Life Your Health articles about him.
• Under "About Us - Partners," Mark's name continues with the designation, "Co-Founder, In Memoriam."

If ever, one of his sons or daughter becomes a healthcare provider and joins SETMA, their name will join that of their father.

In such "activities of remembering" and in such "memorializing," we do honor to Mark, but we also do honor to ourselves; for as our lives are all a collage of the influences and input of many, our lives are forever linked with Mark Wilson. As we carry on, we carry with us our experiences and our memories with and of Mark Wilson. The texture of our memories changes; there is less pain and tears are rare, but the depth and value of our memories only grow. Unlike with the living where we are making new memories and having new experiences, our memories of Mark are static yet they continue to make a contribution to who we are. Thus, we remember, because it is in remembering that we know that we are real and that we are human. I can hear his voice, see his face, and experience his smile and his tears. He is gone but never forgotten. And, in reality, according to our belief, we shall see him again.

On March 13, 2009, I sent the following note to Mark and subsequently read it to him:

"Just now, I have seen the end of the 1969 version of the movie, 'Goodbye Mr. Chips.' You may remember that in 1939, the first 'Good-bye Mr. Chips' was released. Robert Donat won the best actor award that year for playing Mr. Chips and it is well worth watching. Donat was competing against Gone with the Wind and Clark Gable. At end of the 1969 version, Mr. Chips walks from his "rooms" where he is retired, back to the school where he taught for over 50 years. He had just been visited by a small boy whose great grandfather had been taught by Mr. Chips.

As Chips, walks down the road, he remembers his wife, long deceased, and he sings to himself the song which had been recorded by his co-star, Petula Clark. The lyrics are:

"In the morning of my life I shall look to the sunrise.
At a moment in my life when the world is new.
And the blessing I shall ask is that God will grant me,
To be brave and strong and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life through.

(Chorus)

"And to fill the world with love
And to fill the world with love
And to fill the world with love my whole life through

"In the noontime of my life I shall look to the sunshine,
At a moment in my life when the sky is blue.
And the blessing I shall ask shall remain unchanging.
To be brave and strong and true,
And to fill the world with love my whole life through

(Chorus)

"In the evening of my life I shall look to the sunset,
At a moment in my life when the night is due.
And the question I shall ask only I can answer.
Was I brave and strong and true?
Did I fill the world with love my whole life through?"

"Chips changed one phrase in the song. In the third stanza, which stated, "Was I brave and strong and true?" he sang, thinking of his wife, "Was I brave and strong like you?" It was a melancholy moment, and, of course, I thought of the courage and character of our own friend. As I am much older than he, and as I know that someday, I will face the "sunset" of my life, I suspect that I cannot and will not do it as well as he has done.

"He has set a high standard for us all and I believe God has blessed him with longer life as a result of his sweet spirit. We shall continue to pray for him as he goes home from the hospital today.

"God bless you, my friend. YOU ARE a reMARKable man!!!!"